February 2013 Newsletter – Child Abuse

by David Jones
Restoration Path Ex. Director

 

Matthew 18:6-76 

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea. 7 Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes! (NKJV)

BoyComputer

I was raised by a father who taught and modeled that men should be protectors of women and children. Because of that upbringing, I just see “red” when I observe any form of abuse toward women or children. I am particularly inflamed with ire when it comes to the mistreatment of children. I spent over 15 years of my life working with children that had experienced all types of severe emotional, spiritual, physical, and sexual abuse. In most of those cases, I was unable to get at the source or the offender connected to these abuses because so much time had passed. I believed that finding the source from which the abuse originated was paramount in stopping the generational perpetuation of these offenses. I still believe that today. We must get at the source and stop it before another generation is lost.

We live in a world today that openly and overtly abuses our children on a daily basis. Let me state the obvious, we live in a supercharged sexual world. These sexualized messages have infiltrated every aspect of our children’s world. Everything from cartoons, kid’s movies, video games, and clothing carry overt sexual messages. Some of you may ask; “What’s the big deal?” The big deal is that it is child abuse. Before you close out this letter and believe that I am being overly puritanical, narrow minded, and old fashioned; please hear my evidence.

A human’s brain is like any other system or organ in our body. It goes through stages of development or maturation. These stages are similar to stair steps. There are things that need to occur in each step that matures the brain and allows it to move into the next step. Each previous step becomes a building block or foundation for future growth. A human’s brain is not ready to be overly simulated sexually until several stages are completed within their developmental framework. They need to complete both puberty and the stages of adolescent development. With the onset of puberty, chemicals are released within the human’s brain that starts a construction project. Visualize very small bridges being built within the child’s brain. In the future, these bridges are part of God’s design to direct the sexually charged messages into their correct locations of the brain. What would happen if a child receives a sexually charged message prior to the construction beginning or being completed? The brain doesn’t know where to send this message and it responds with both pleasure and confusion. In many cases the pleasurable response produces a craving that is similar to cocaine. Even though the brain is confused, this intense craving pushes the desire to be repeated. When our children are exposed to these messages, their developmental, mental, and spiritual growth is stagnated. With this stagnation, these teenagers will chronologically become adults but they stay stuck in their adolescent stages. The end result is to perpetuate another generation of sexual idolatry.

Almost 100% of the sexual addicts I have talked with were sexually abused. Most of them were not abused in the traditional definition of the word such as molestation or rape. Their abuse occurred when overexposed to sexual stimulation in early adolescence or younger. 30 years ago this abuse came through soft core pornographic magazines and the initial age of exposure was around 16 years old. 25 years ago this abuse came through cable movie channels and this new invention called the internet. The initial exposure then became age 12. Today, children don’t have to go looking for sexual images because it comes to them in every form of media and electronic device available. There are billions of pornographic websites and that does not include the use of social media, sexting, and “homemade” porn. The soft core porn of 30 years ago does not exist because now it is called network TV. Children are being exposed to graphic, digitized, hard core pornography and the age of initial exposure drops lower each day.

We can’t completely stop our children from being exposed to sexual images and behavior. We can become more educated regarding the electronic delivery system and the use of effective blocking and monitoring systems such as Covenant Eyes. We can create open homes where our children know that it is ok to talk about sexual issues. We as adults can begin to model healthy patterns of God honoring behavior. Every child born into the US today will have to struggle with sexual temptation. We can give them the tools to fight that temptation or we can turn our backs to the ongoing abuse of our children.

If you are a parent or grandparent reading this, I hope you see red when you think about the abuse of your children and grandchildren. Our God is bigger than this issue and He can take back this country. He can heal the wounded minds and hearts of our children. We cannot do this on our own but we can truly do this through His might and strength.

We thank you for your financial support that allows us to continue in this fight. If your church has an interest in receiving training and teachings in this area, please contact us. If you or a loved one is struggling with the affects of sexual sin, please contact us.

Coming Soon! We look forward to the release of our latest video workshop, Family Freedom. It is an in home workshop designed to strengthen and empower families to deal with the affects of sexual sin. Check our web site for the release date and further information.

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About David Jones

David is a Memphis native and lives with his wife of 25 years and two children. David has a Master’s Degree in Counseling from the University of Memphis. He has worked in mental health for over 30 years with adolescents and adults in inpatient, outpatient, and residential settings. For the past 15 years David’s primary focus has been working with men and their spouses in intensive sexual addiction workshops.

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